5 Steps I took to re-create a loving relationship with my body!
Re-wiring my brain from hating my body to loving it took a strong commitment, solid amount of effort and multiple what I used to think were set backs to get me to where I am now. Now I can see them for what they truly were and still are.. tests and lessons to reprogram set in stone thought patterns, influences of media, actions and resulting lifestyle habits.
Growing up in today’s world it’s almost inevitable to not compare yourself or begin to judge yourself from an early age. We have so much information, points of view on beauty and the concept of what healthy actually is, just at the end of our finger tips. Constantly triggering and changing our thought processes of am I actually good enough?
Changing my appreciation for my body from hate to love and the day I stopped comparing myself to others was honestly the day I probably saved my life. Being 175cm tall and weighing close to 38kg I now look back on as absolutely terrifying, but even then it still wasn’t enough. My days consisted of self sabotage on social platforms, a job where my body was my money maker, a relationship with the scales more than 20-30 times a day, controlled meals and resulting intense exercise programs to make up for any “imperfect” altercations that I had made to my extremely frail and unhealthy (both mentally and physically) Physique. I called bullshit on my life and set some very strict ground rules which seemed like an absolutely painful withdrawal, for what essentially was my addictive nature. Subconsciously I knew and trusted my intuition with my process strongly enough to over-ride with time, my long held shocking lifestyle patterns.
As both men and women, no matter what level of destructive or loving body habits you have towards yourself, these are steps you can take to changing your thought process from self sabotaging, fatiguing and mentally draining to loving, embracing and passionately living your days out as who you are!
“Building your loving relationship… Things you should be adding or removing to your days.
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1. Creating a Mindset of Enough:
Creating a mindset of Enough. The obsessiveness that comes with achieving “Perfection” comes with a long list of draining routines and resulting lifestyle habits. Perfection can be skewed, as we are all completely different individuals it is near impossible to be “perfect” like someone else, as we are made up completely different, we have to create our own perfection of simply being enough as who we are. It gets to the point where you become so exhausted of running away from our initial problems of insecurity, rejection or confrontation with our past in which make us seek out to better ourselves, but how to better ourselves mindfully, healthily and positively. I choose to better myself to be happy, I choose to better myself to create my own story, and I choose to better myself to do something now, In the future I will be bloody thankful for doing!
2. Remove the scales:
Dependent on your relationship with your body and stage of life, I can tell you right now a number is never going to be enough or completely and utterly satisfactory. I chased a number of what I thought would make me the happiest person alive and it never did. In contrast I understand if you are wanting to loose weight for major health reasons this is great to monitor, but by creating your process as.. “I want to be the healthiest person I can possibly be” instead of “I want to become the skinniest I can possibly be” will create resulting intentions in every aspect, inclusive of nutrition, mindset and lifestyle habits. Stop chasing a number and start chasing the aspect of all the elements in which make you feel 1. Well, 2. Happy, 3. Authentic in who you are
“Stop chasing a number and chase the things that make you feel present.
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3. Acceptance of Changing old Routines:
Building an understanding and nourishing relationship with food, is an art of its own but can be done. When it comes down to it any bodily related or food related disorder doesn’t actually stem from the food, it stems from the unwillingness to deal with the determining factor that is making us feel less than, or not suitable in our own skin. Getting real here, I’m able to look back and say my insecurities stemmed from rejections from work, primarily my image which then further stemmed into what I thought beauty was, which further more stemmed into what I thought I needed to look like to be accepted in both relationships and friendships, these were my own long held stories and patterns in which I connected to my controlled eating and exercise habits. Finding fleeting moments of happiness when I counteracted my eating habits and found content in creating nourishing food, allowing myself to rest and initially calling bullshit on how I was treating and depriving my body, was the little steps I needed to and still need to take in getting clear and saying “My weight is not and does not = my happiness” “My happiness is knowing that I am enough, I am healthy and I am well because I treat my body with kindness, nourish it with good food and fill my days with elements I enjoy!”
4. Mirror Motivations: Changing your mindset from hate to love:
I will get a lot of clients laughing at the concept of telling a part of their body that they love it! I always counter act that laugh with why is it funny to tell something positive to your body when you find it simply the norm to place hate on it? See my drift? This whole process is about reprogramming the absolute bullsh*t and hardships we place on ourselves to loving positive acceptance of our bodies. In the mirror, be as kind to your process as you can and take your time, stand in front of the mirror, what ever way your brain usually picks apart the elements or an element of your body I want you to counter act that negative into a positive. “I hate my thighs they are so large” to “I’m thankful for my body, I’m thankful that I have the choice to make myself healthy and to create a lifestyle where I can love my body as well as my thighs” This might seem a little funny, bit just sit with that concept and see how it feels, how can you love yourself and who you are? Bring love to the places you bring hate.
5. Get Clear: Start each day fresh!
How can you test your routines, question: "Is what I’m doing making my life easier or is it making it harder?"
With anything we fill our days with we want to be doing it because we actually want to be doing it, stopping to think, is it benefitting my process? With any long held routine that is depleting it usually stems from filling a void to seek what we think is “perfection”. In the case of loving your body I want you to look at key factors:
Are you pushing yourself further than you actually want to be?
Are you allowing yourself to rest when you can?
Do you feel run down or unsatisfied from your routines?
Do you feel a disconnect from yourself?
What is making you scared to break these routines?
What are your answers to these questions? Starting each day, before you wake up set an intention for your day, not around an object, another person or anything other than yourself to create satisfaction, but simply something or multiple things you can do for yourself to create healthier routines. “Today I choose to look after myself by creating movement my body can handle, nourish myself with food to give me energy and keep me healthy as well as mindfully happy as I deserve to be"
Yep lots of self talk here! Questioning our own questions is where we build our awareness and where we build our awareness is where we make change! So simply start!
“I am Enough”
Saturday the 23rd of June I'll be running my second Body Image Workshop, I'd love to have you there! Click the link below for more information! Sammie x